But hidden below the Chaplain's School's Motor Pool, beneath miles of concrete and steel...
...Is the Top Secret Location of G.I. Joe Headquarters. Code Name: The Pit.
Flint: So Hawk, what did those dildos over at SOCOM want this time?
Hawk: Oh, nothing. Some Brit had his knickers in a bunch about some "mysterious terrorist" organization called "Cobra" or something and they want the Joes to stay on the lookout.
Flint: Cobra? Sounds gay.
Hawk: Yeah, totally gay. Anyway, I need you to take a squad and transport some warheads to some contractors in Charleston.
Flint: No sweat. See you later, chief.
LATER...
Flint: All right, Joes, listen up! This military contractor is well connected to the highest levels of government. We need to make sure these warheads are delivered safe and sound!
Stalker: Gung Ho, Roadblock! You heard the man! Get those warheads loaded into the cargo truck. Once they're loaded, we'll convoy down to Charleston and get them delivered.
Roadblock: Whatever you say. Uncle Tom mothafucka...
Gung Ho: Yo, Joe!
Flint: Once Roadblock and Gung Ho get the roadheads loaded up, Falcon and Stalker will lead the convoy and I'll ride with you Lady Jaye!
Lady Jaye: Warheads. You mean warheads.
Flint: What did I say?
Lady Jaye: You said "Road Head."
Flint: I think you're hearing things, Lady Jaye.
Flint: All right, Joes! Let's roll out!
Falcon: Isn't that what Optimus Prime says?
Stalker: Who is Optimus Prime?
Falcon: Nevermind.
Firefly: Here they come...right on schedule....
A LITTLE BIT LATER...
Flint: Glad we're finally on the Road...head toward Charleston.
Lady Jaye: Knock it off.
Flint: What?
Stalker: This sure is an easy assignment. Nothing could possibly go wrong....
AT THAT INSTANT...
Cobra Squadron: COBRA!!!!
Lady Jaye: Flint, wake up! We've got company!
Firefly: Run the V.A.M.P.s off the road!
Firefly: With the rear guard out of the way, we can get the warheads!
Cobra Soldiers: COBRA!!!
Cobra Soldier #2: Firefly, we've got the warheads loaded, sir!
Firefly: Mission accomplished! Let's get out of here and get these warheads back to Cobra Commander!
Cobra Squadron: COBRA!!!
MOMENTS LATER...
Stalker: What the hell was that?!
Flint: I think I know, Stalker. And if I'm right, then we've got to get back to the Pit and tell General Hawk what just happened.
LATER THAT DAY...
Hawk: Flint! I just read your report! What the hell happened out there?!
Flint: General Hawk...I think Cobra is real.
Hawk: Dear God. If you're right Flint, then Cobra's not only real...but it's got our roadheads.
Flint: Warheads.
Hawk: What did I say?
